November 30 marked 10 years since my first hedgehog Freya passed away. In her four years of life, she bore witness to a lot of major transitions for me. A lot has changed even more since she died. But the person I was when I was with her is still here. And life is better having had her in it.
Hedgehogs are delightfully expressive. When they're grouchy or uncomfortable, they huff and pull their quills up. They arch their back, tuck in their head, and the quills rise up as if pulled by a string on their forehead, settling into a protective criss-cross pattern rather than sticking straight out. When they uncurl, their heads poke out first, and then their forearms come out from between their back legs.
When hedgehogs are relaxed, their quills soften and go smooth. They stretch out, turning into long beans. They eagerly perch with their front paws close together and sniff the air. When they’re excited, they run fast, lifting their bodies higher so their legs have room to move. They run in every corner they can find, making figure eights in their cage and hopping in and out of their wheel, over and over and over, stopping to check their air for a second before zooming again.
Hedgehog quills are made of keratin, the same stuff as our hair and nails. They're not super long, but they can be sharp! Quills hurt more when they're tense, so for the first few weeks as you're first learning about each other, picking a hedgehog up is painful. I would use my sweatshirt sleeves to cushion the quills. After a few months, I’d get used to the prickles or she’d be more relaxed. I wouldn't need the cushion to pick them up anymore, although I still used my sleeves if I had them. Their quills are soft to pet. Only in one direction, though, like a shark.
Hedgehogs go through a shedding period in the first year or so and then they don't lose quills too often after that. Different hedgies have different colours and patterns on their quills. Freya's were almost gold at the ends and had two stripes of ash brown with three stripes of white. During our last week together she dropped one last quill on my chest for me when we were having our evening snuggle. I didn’t throw that one out. It felt like a parting gift.
Hedgehogs are such funny, intimate creatures. They're curious and bond intensely with their caretakers. They like routine and hate crowds. They like exploring nooks and crannies, and they like to climb even though their depth perception is absolute shit. They sleep all day and run all night. Hedgehogs can run for miles in their little wheels and I used to wonder how one could turn their nighttime adventuring into electrical power.
The best bonding time was floor time, when I'd put Freya down on a towel in the evenings. She'd quickly run off the towel to explore as much as she could and I'd watch to make sure she didn't go into any crannies I couldn't retrieve her from. Sometimes she'd find a spot and nap. Sometimes she'd spend ten minutes investigating, running up to sniff and then turning around and running a different direction. She liked to climb on my shoulder, stomach, and across my legs, and sometimes she'd nearly get stuck in my hair. Sometimes she'd find a new smell and do this thing called "anointing."
"Anointing" is this weird thing that hedgehogs do but no one is quite sure why. When they find something with a new or strong smell, they'll bite and lick it frantically, building a froth of saliva, then stop and use their tongues to slap that pile of bubbly spit onto their back. One theory is it helps them adjust to new smells, another theory is it makes their quills more irritating for predators.
Hedgehogs are omnivores. They eat bugs and fruit and, Zeal's favourite, plain chicken. They can't eat food that sticks to their teeth. Hedgehog food is similar to cat food but with a lower fat content. Freya was pickier than Zeal was, and she only liked eating her hedgehog food. She was a dainty lady and the only time I saw her tail was when she stopped to poo. Zeal, on the other hand, regularly kept his tail out and slept with his legs splayed out.
Hedgehogs are unapologetically full of dichonomies. They are cautious long-legged night creatures who keep their vulnerable bellies low to the ground, but they're also energetic and their spikes are associated with the sun. They’re solitary but also require regular socializing with their humans. They’re soft and friendly but also grumpy and spikey.
I no longer change her water or visit her spot on my shelf everyday. The locket with her picture and the last quill she gave me in it got tarnished and I stopped wearing it as much. But I have her paw prints tattooed on my chest, and I can still remember her bright eyes and twitchy nose when she would lay on my chest or squirm to tell me she wanted to explore. Her soft tiny feet pattering and her round bum wobbling as she crouched. She had long legs but only stretched them out when she ran, or to scratch her back.
The night before the anniversary, I made a spot on my bookshelf for hers and Zeal’s things so I could visit them again. I took the morning off of work to rest, and I polished the locket so it shines as bright as it did 10 years ago. When I got home, I gave her fresh water and had some locally brewed mead in her honour.
Freya was my little explorer who introduced me to the Norse pantheon and solidified my love for all things soft and spiky. Freya taught me not to apologize for setting or expressing boundaries. She showed me how to balance my needs for solitude and company as well as my needs for rest and play. I miss you, Frey-Frey. I'm grateful I got to be your human.
In The Adventures of Captain Zeal, Captain Zeal’s ship is named after Freya. Captain Zeal will meet the namesake of his ship during his upcoming adventure to Asgard. I’m looking forward to hanging out with them again!
Freyja T. Catton is a writer, artist, and researcher based in Alberta, Canada. More of their work is available at Wordeater News or on their website, https://thewordeater.com.